
I’ve read online articles about gaslighting. By publishers such as Psychology Today, Washington Post, Wired, Huffpost. Hopefully most everyone understands what this is about – in personal & social relationships, corporate PR, and politics. Misleading communications, misinformation, manipulation, abuse.
As Carl Sagan discussed regarding critical thinking skills, a good “baloney detection kit” protects against false narratives, especially in unequal power relationships.
This article includes some historical recap. As well as mentioning the rest of the year’s Top 10 words.
• AP News > “‘Gaslighting’ is Merriam-Webster’s word of the year for 2022” by LEANNE ITALIE (November 28, 2022)
(quote) Merriam-Webster’s top definition for gaslighting is the psychological manipulation of a person, usually over an extended period of time, that “causes the victim to question the validity of their own thoughts, perception of reality, or memories and typically leads to confusion, loss of confidence and self-esteem, uncertainty of one’s emotional or mental stability, and a dependency on the perpetrator.”
“It’s a word that has risen so quickly in the English language, and especially in the last four years, that it actually came as a surprise to me and to many of us,” said Peter Sokolowski, Merriam-Webster’s editor at large, in an exclusive interview with The Associated Press ahead of Monday’s unveiling.
Here’s Oxford University Press’ word of the year 2022 (the Press publishes the Oxford English Dictionary). The article includes the runner-up words, as well as past words of the year.
• bbc.com > “Oxford word of the year 2022 revealed as ‘goblin mode’” by Imogen James, BBC News (12-5-2022)
Another take on Oxford University Press’ word of the year 2022.
• The Atlantic > Culture > “We’re All Capable of Going ‘Goblin Mode'” by Caleb Madison (December 10, 2022) – In goblin mode, we can become our true wild selves, unkempt and offstage, triumphantly invisible to the public eye.
The gaslighter’s playbook …
• CNBC > “Harvard psychologist shares 9 toxic phrases ‘gaslighters’ always use—and how to respond” by Dr. Cortney Warren, Contributor (July 3, 2023)
See full article for more detail on each phrase, with appropriate responses.
Somewhat off topic for this post, but BS can undermine connection with reality as well – for both speaker and listener(s). Another way to manipulate attitudes and feelings.
• Washington Post > “Harry Frankfurt, philosopher of excrement-level falsehoods, dies at 94” by Michael S. Rosenwald (July 18, 2023) – In Dr. Frankfurt’s view, the problem at the core of his book was more complicated than simply saying something untrue.
How does one deal with gaslighting? Here’re some tips. Including red flags. Staying grounded in facts and having a support group are vital.
• Washington Post > Well+Being > “How to deal with the 3 levels of gaslighting – Advice” by Robin Stern and Marc Brackett (April 26, 2024) – From occasional to insistent critical statements, severity depends on frequency, intensity, extensiveness, intentionality, and one’s resiliency.
Some key points
How to respond to someone who makes you feel like your reality is being questioned? This article offers tips to ground the narrative, set boundaries, and retain focus.
• Time > Health > Mental Health > “7 Things to Say When Someone Gaslights You” by Angela Haupt (June 26, 2024)
Key points (quoted)